How I manage to hold on to my Catholic faith in America

In the midst of consumerism and getting ahead in the rat race I find myself deeply in need of spiritual nourishment. Now, in Los Angeles, one might think that people only know rap, movies, and basketball. I'm pleased to report however that wherever I go, I see very healthy and thriving religious communities. But then given the state I am in at the moment, I am restricted to places that are close by. Hence, my desire for more religious information in my quest to deepen my spirituality. When I bought my Ipod touch, it was when that I discovered that amazing invention called the "podcast."

A little after a year from listening to my first podcast, here I am, raring to go to San Antonio, TX to attend my first SQPN New Media celebration on June 27, 2009. I am looking forward to meeting the other podcasters and speakers that I always listen to on either the Daily Breakfast, Catholic Answers Live, just to name a few of the podcasts that I am subscribed to.

More on the NMC when I return from Texas on June 29.

Rockstars of tomorrow

Everytime I watch tv or the net, I always get fascinated by the latest ads. Worth mentioning are the Intel Rockstar Ad featuring the co-inventor of the USB (yes, the flash drive), where co-employees of Intel flock to him and ask for autographs, one guy even flashing his homemade Ajay shirt with his impression on it. Very brief ad, but really sends the message across with the line --Our rockstars aren't like your rockstars. Very cool, indeed.

Another ad that never ceases to amaze me is the Dos Equis ad where it shows the "Most Interesting Man in the World." The whole commercial goes on showing the man (personified by actor Jonathan Goldsmith) living "vicariously," playing pelota in what seems to be a circa late 1970's home movie. Up til now the whole thing doesn't make sense to me but it is interesting and does make you want to grab a beer bottle, not necessarily Dos Equis though.

So far these two have rubbed off good impressions on this viewer. Will post more comments as I scour the web for more. Ciao.

Dating....dating...done.

Went out with a guy last Saturday. I'm in that part of my life again where I fear being rejected again. Will I ever see him again? I hope so. I pray so.

Falling apart

Things have gone south since my last post. My pseudo-relationship with James has finally come to an end. I willed it to end. But I still have not come to terms with the breakup. I am still in denial. And will remain to be. I love the man. I loved him for three years. I sacrificed a lot. But he is yet to prove himself worthy of that love. I tried. I cannot wait. Any longer.

Reminds me of an old song in my younger days:

"Why do I love you, why did you hurt my heart that way;
why did you take my love away,
why do I keep on waiting and hoping,
Yet I know
That you can never be mine....
Again."

Paranoia

Definition

Paranoia is an unfounded or exaggerated distrust of others, sometimes reaching delusional proportions. Paranoid individuals constantly suspect the motives of those around them, and believe that certain individuals, or people in general, are "out to get them." (www.answers.com)

In a nutshell, this describes the feeling I have towards my boyfriend at the moment. Two days have passed since I have last heard from him. In times bygone, whenever he gets quiet for days, something always happens in his family --emergency, sickness, even death. I can't take it when he gets so quiet all of a sudden since we have had a history where he dismissed me outright without giving much of an explanation other than a brief message on one of my social utility pages.

I keep praying and crossing my fingers that he has not changed his mind, that he is okay and just went somewhere, that he would still communicate with me...

As the economy gets worse, more and more peope are out on the streets

As I traverse the stretch of Santa Monica boulevard on my way to work everyday, I see more and more people pushing shopping carts on the street. Just across where I work is a Lutheran church where a homeless guy sleeps upon its steps. And a black man in dreadlocks who walks around with a guitar case in his back. I can't help but think that people back home are luckier since, on top of favorable weather, we look out for each other. We just run to the neighbor's whenever we run out of something and we need it for the interim. The Philippines maybe a poverty-stricken country but I would like to believe that we churn out more college graduates per capita than the United States does. In a time such as this I am reminded of how lucky we Filipinos are for being resilient and for having weathered out situations worse that what the United States is experiencing. Like what our elders would always say, once you hit rock bottom, there's really no other way to go than up.

stumbling across exes in facebook

How does it feel? Relieved. Closure has finally come.